Date Set

So much for first class.  In a flash, my Seattle plans were dashed.  My eyes passed over the email, whose contents smashed me like a hammer.  “Depart September 17th”, it read.  And hope of making good on my promise crashed to the ground.

Previously, the school had told me vaguely “the end of the month” and so I’d been thinking I would leave during the last week of September.  Consequently, this really shocked me.  For the first time since this process began in March, I felt a twinge of apprehension about going.  All day, I’ve been especially worried about leaving my mother and my sister.  How is Mom going to keep up the house?  Will sister feel abandoned since she cannot have open dialogue with other family members?  What about my friends?  Can I fit them all into a weekend?  Can I resolve the situation with Brian in under a week?  What will I do with all of my stuff?  When will I tell my Dad?  And, shit…I can only count to four in Korean.

Also, my uncle passed away in Korea early this summer a few days after he’d landed.  Busan.  That’s the city I’m going to.  He was a special case, having been a heart transplant patient, but he had felt a little sick before making the flight.  And so my Mom today, “Don’t rake the leaves because I don’t want your allergies to flare up before your trip.”  Such a Mom thing to say, but I feel it was related to my uncle’s situation.  It depresses me to think she worries that much (I’m gonna fix the yard, anyway.  It would be ridiculous to saddle her with all of that).

But now, at 5:15am, I’ve gotten over the shock and I’m steeled once again.  My practice is to have confidence when things have been done many times before.  I’m certainly not the first to move away from family.  I’m certainly not the first to hop a trans-pacific flight and I’m certainly not the first to struggle with basic commands in the Korean language.  So, today I get my ticket, live it up this weekend (starting today, my 28th) and boldly venture to what’s sure to be a memorable and meaningful experience.