In that post, I bandied about the idea of finding an Internet date for the concert. It was a very real possibility; at the time, I was thinking of how to explain to a random girl on a dating website that I wanted to meet her and pay her way to a $70 concert within 3 days. It doesn’t seem as far-fetched now as it did then, but it’s not my M.O. In any event, I’m glad I didn’t do it. Even after the concert, I’ve stayed on the OKCupid, you know…trying to get a little adventure during the month I have left. It’s flattering when I receive an initial email from a woman often there’s no attraction or she lives in Modesto or some other faraway place. What’s even the point of that? I always wondered why a person would specify something over 30 miles as their search range. Hell, I’ll even give ‘em 50 miles. But are you really gonna travel over 50 miles to meet a person you’ve been talking to over the Internet?

On second thought, scratch that question.

Well, I guess if it’s strictly to get laid. But, me…well, I have a more noble focus! I’m trying to establish a physical and emotional connection with a lovely woman…just to throw it all away once I leave the country for a year on February 24. Much more responsible, I know.

Anyway, as a guy, the way to communicate on OKCupid is to blast out the initial messages. A few criteria: does she look good? Does she live close? Does she write in complete sentences? Then, send it! And when a reply arrives, it’s so cool. It’s like being granted a job interview–it’s good to make it to that next level and to get the opportunity to use my Internet correspondence skills to convince a chick to meet me in person. But, like a job interview, it’s still stressful. The messaging phase is so precarious. A delicate balance must be struck between giving and getting information and not seeming either too eager or too disinterested. It’s like those Lumberjack Games on ESPN3 where the guys have to balance on the rolling log in the water. In my mind, though, perception of me is always taken to the extreme; I envision that the girl on the other side sees me as either an obnoxious flake or a lurking creeper, with nothing in between. In reality, I’m just a guy completely overanalyzing the situation.

So, I bought some Dr. Scholl’s heel pads from the drugstore and inserted them into my Brooks Beasts over my existing heel pads. I doubled up on the socks in addition to the double heel pads, so even after I tightened the laces my feet were rising up out of the shoes with every step. It felt as if I were standing up on a platform but, I must say, it did feel pillow-soft. I wanted to take every precaution before doing real running instead of the constant start/stop of a basketball game.

That I made it through the first 20-30 steps pain-free was a very positive sign. Previously, when trying to do the hills, the sharp pain appeared the moment I switched from walking TO my starting point to actually running the route. I ran gingerly, consciously trying to run on the toes of my right foot instead of my heels. A few times, perhaps getting lost in the music, I did hit my heel pretty hard but the pain wasn’t enough to disrupt my run. The problem for this run was stamina–I ran while listening to “Pack Up“, “Conga” and “Missing The Light Of Day“, but I had to walk during “La Isla Bonita”. Ran for the rest of the songs, which I can’t remember, but by that time it was downhill. Still psyched! The foot is getting better and it’s just as well–after the holidays and not exercising steadily for, well…months…I have plenty of catching up to do.

Naomi is the one who invited me to Red Rock Cafe in Mountain View. The place had a Open Mic Night on Mondays and one of her coworkers from the Chemistry department had decided to get onstage and play his guitar. It turned out to be a great idea. Red Rock is the quintessential “community” cafe. It’s a hangout; people of all ages and colors convened there to study, chill with other folks and listen to the music and poetry. It was nice to see Mathieu get up and play, but the real treat was Casey. He was probably just 22 then (just last year), but he blew away all of the other Open Mic performances that night such that I almost felt sorry for them. How can I classify his style? Folksy-bluegrass-singer-songwriter, perhaps? What I am sure about is that the guy demonstrates technical ability on guitar far beyond what is common for guitarists his age, he sings like a professional and he writes appealing music.

I remember inviting Brian to come and see the Open Mic. I wanted him to see actual performers on an actual stage in hopes it would inspire him to practice and take baby steps in attempting to craft a ridiculous career as a conservative rapper. Casey Wickstrom happened to perform again that night and Brian refused to acknowledge the talent. Frankly, that’s when I knew Brian had gone off the deep end. Anyway, Casey was nice, though. I bought his CD and he, Brian, Naomi, Shawn and myself all went to eat In N’ Out down the road. He told us all about himself. He had been playing as a child in different bands in Colorado, came West to S.F. but landed with family on the Peninsula and, at the time, was doing the coffee shop circuit and trying to gain exposure. He has the talent to be a star. I think he can be a star. If he ever does become famous, I’ll have that story to tell.

Anyway, I saw him at Red Rock again last night. A year later and he’s gotten even better. Red Rock knew this time; they hurried through all of the other amateurs and then Casey an entire hour at the end. New songs and a newfound confidence. The audience knew him and they responded to his performance with truly heartfelt applause. Everyone recognized it now if they hadn’t before. I really want this kid to get the widespread recognition he deserves.

My new favorite site, Pajiba, posted one of the best lists I’ve ever seen on the Internet today: “Like A Fine Wine: 11 Women Who Only Got Better With Age“. They hit all of these entries dead-on. I mean, I’ve personally wasted many hours of life watching Karen Sisco and Spy Kids just for Carla Gugino, Weeds for Mary-Louise Parker and, of all things, The New Adventures of Old Christine (holy shit, I may actually have seen every episode) because Julia Louis-Dreyfus is sneaky hot.

The Closer? What, I’m gonna watch that to see J.K. Simmons?? Shit, I still have an image of Kyra Sedgwick in Phenomenon etched onto my brain! Marisa Tomei…come on. She always plays a sexpot…consider The Wrestler and What Women Want and, of course, My Cousin Vinny, in which she played an intelligent sexpot. Look, I paid money to watch Date Night because Tina Fey was in it…and I think there was a well-advertised Mila Kunis cameo. I’ve only seen bits and pieces of The Good Wife, but it’s on my list of shows to catch up on because I want to see more of Juliana Marguiles and to see Kalinda scowl at me in my dreams.

It Wasn't Me!

Julianne Moore goes without saying, and Stacey Dash requires no evidence beyond this. I haven’t seen much of Connie Britton and I never watched The X-Files, but I trust Pajiba’s judgment based on their other selections. Lemme just throw in lovely Rachel Weisz to round it out to an even 12 and there you have it…a perfect Internet list!

Anyway, I read a Gawker post about guys who exhibit clingy and borderline-stalker behavior after going on dates. One man, in particular, was able to email the woman he’d gone out with once because he searched for and found it on the Internet. As far as I know, no one is stalking me. However, I googled my screen name just to see how much information came up. It was surprisingly little, though I did run into a treasure trove of sorts. I found my old blogs on Xanga and Blogger! I’m talking about WhatUpThen’s Xanga and Ice Climber! I had the Xanga just for a couple of months, from February to March 2003. Ice Climber happened during graduate school and just a little bit after, from May 2004 to January 2006. I’m surprised these blogs are still up but it’s just…heartwarming–I almost want to cry! It is so fucking cool to see this stuff that I wrote back in the day. What’s interesting is that I feel I haven’t changed much in these nine years. I definitely sound like a kid in the Xanga blog but, for the most part, my situation hasn’t changed; I’m still working in education, still living at home, still talking about entertainment and basketball and observations of people. One of my favorite lines was from a February 2003 post in which I wished my friend Eric a happy birthday and then asked (in the blog) if he was free that weekend. That hasn’t changed, either; I’m still leaning on Eric and MK3 to entertain me on weekends. Kinda cool, yet kinda sad!

And last, I enjoyed this post in particular.

Fuck, I like this one, too!!

I’m totally typing this from my phone!

In college, there was an accessible athlete I once spoke with. I told him I was from Hayward and he replied something like: “Hayward? Of course! I grew up right over in Danville!” His tone of voice made it seem as if he were equating the two cities–excuse me, equating the city and the town, but my visit to Danville yesterday reminded me that some people live very differently than others.

I wanted to find The Athenian School, where I’ll have some SAT work next month. The name sounded upper-crust. I should have known that Danville was fancy, too, simply based on the fact that in 30 years I’d never been there, though the drive is under 30 minutes. And it didn’t hit me right away–exiting the freeway, I saw typical suburbia, including a nice-looking elementary school, no biggie. But the drive to my destination was taking me farther and farther from the freeway, uphill along twisting roads. The trees along the sides of the road had lush foliage, while plush SUVs zoomed by me in the opposing lane. At last, I found The Athenian. Its name was emblazoned on a rustic wooden sign which clashed with the bright Astroturf field just beyond it. I had never actually seen a boarding school, but I could immediately tell because this place looked so residential. It was a cross between an Ivy League campus and a summer camp. It was a hidden grove of backpacks and science labs and soccer, but what kids could possibly go there?

My only previous references for boarding schools are Cruel Intentions and Swans Crossing. Actually, I don’t think Swans Crossing had boarding schools but, whatever.

Afterward, I found myself in Draeger’s market in neighboring Blackhawk. I bought three Pink Lady apples and one slice of bakery cheesecake for my mom and it cost $9.97. The SINGLE SLICE OF CAKE cost $4.50 and the THREE APPLES cost FOUR DOLLARS AND SIXTY-MOTHERFUCKING-NINE CENTS!!!! Everything in the store was priced sky-high, even the stuff that can be found in Safeway. But the people who shop there every week don’t realize it or, perhaps more accurately, don’t care. It’s a small thing, but it’s million little differences like it that pool to create mammoth chasms between our beliefs and values.

Cirque Du Soleil is totally awesome. I’ve seen Quidam and I’ve seen Zumanity twice because the music and performances were so incredibly good. Now, there’s Michael Jackson: Immortal which has been on my radar for months. I’ve been listening to the soundtrack on Spotify since Tuesday, November 22 (thanks Spotify Calendar!) and I can’t wait to see it. I’m more broke than I’ve been in years, yet I spent nearly the last few bucks in my bank account on tickets for me and my sister. The show and her birthday are next week and we thought it would be a nice bonding time since she’s always busy with work and her son. Also, she is equally interested in seeing a Michael Jackson-themed show and she doesn’t get out to entertainment too much these days. Trouble is, her boyfriend was thinking this because he told me today that he got tickets for the two of them for the second performance (my tix are for Tuesday and his are for Wednesday). I’d told my sister beforehand that I was willing to be the third wheel because I didn’t want to leave the bf out, but she said he would have to babysit anyway. Apparently, his purchase is a birthday surprise–she doesn’t know about it yet. I certainly don’t want to get in the way of the two of them and I certainly can’t go WITH them, so I’m left with an extra ticket.

This is where the little black book comes in. This isn’t a sporting event; I can’t invite a guy friend to this. I want to avoid selling one ticket and going alone because going to concerts alone totally sucks. This leaves the options of taking a girl on a date or going with a chick friend. As far as getting a date, well…I had kinda resigned myself to not going on any dates until I move to Korea (and get a paycheck) because I can barely pay for myself on a date right now, much less someone I want to impress. Plus, there’s no one on the docket. It would adventurous to try to hook up an Internet date for Tuesday with some random chick but, man…I’d really have to psyche myself up for that. Okay, so the single lady count for me is at four, but there are issues with each of them. The girl who’d enjoy the show the most is someone I’ve written off as completely nuts and I’ve been trying to distance myself from her for a few years, so she’s out! Another woman is the very recent ex of a good guy friend and, while I like her plenty, I’ve definitely been sorted into his section of the friend split; can’t ask her.

The last two women are good friends, so I can’t really ask one and then ask the other in case the first says no; the information will be passed between them. My interactions with the first one are just so awkward. We CANNOT have a normal conversation and I’ve sworn for years that it’s not me. It just wouldn’t be fun at all. And the other, she’s cool. She’s very cool. She’s ULTRA-cool, even. Fuck, I should just ask her if she wants to go! But, well…I already asked her friend and fuck-why-didn’t-I-wait-until-thinking-it-through-on-this-blog? So, that’s what I’ll be worrying about this weekend. Ideas and solutions are welcome.

So, I have some goals for this upcoming year in South Korea. Of course, I want to get better at my Korean. It’ll take a determined effort to actually speak to Koreans instead of gesturing and smiling at them. I’m not holding my breath over the chances of me regularly doing so. My mom showed me a photo of my father’s mentor holding me as a child. Interesting story: my father grew up poor on a farm in rural Virginia, one of 10 children. To put it bluntly, my father is the thinker of the family and he went on to study Physics at a historically Black college in North Carolina. One of his professors, Dr. Kim (what Korean man isn’t doesn’t have the Kim surname?), really took to him and they became colleagues after graduation. They remained associated when my Dad went to graduate school, at his first engineering job and beyond. I, personally, think it’s fascinating that a Korean man was teaching at a Black college back in 1969–and he actually was born in Korea; I’d love to ask Dr. Kim about the life path that took him there.

Anyway, one of the goals is to see him for the first time as an adult. The last couple of times I was in Korea he was here in the U.S., but he is retired in the home country now and, well…available. It’s exciting when something I should do is actually something I want to do.

Further down in importance on this list is entertainment. I know this sounds like a dumb American squandering/refusing his opportunity to embrace a culture, but, well…I want to catch up on some American television and movies while I’m over there. I’ve made a list that includes Boardwalk Empire and Revenge on TV, as well as the movies Warrior, Hanna and Drive, among others. If I try really hard, I can just eschew all friendmaking and acclimation to my new surroundings for a month and just hole up in my room watching all of it before/after work. Hey, Koreans fill up those PC bangs 24 hours/day! I think I’d actually be doing a passable imitation of that subculture.

"Tebow Time" has replaced "Miller Time" as the all-too-obvious sports phrase of the decade.

Honestly, the Steelers shouldn’t feel that bad about it because they were going up against a home-field advantage to rival that of any city. I mean, these are the fans that put up billboards and publicly clamored to put the 3rd-string quarterback into the starter’s role. If anyone thought the Denver crowd would possibly by tepid in its support for Tebow, or get quiet when the team needed its energy, think again. Plus, there’s the natural excitement over a home playoff game when there hasn’t been one in several years. I witnessed that first-hand at the Warriors’ playoff win at Oracle back in 2007 (goddamn, that was nearly 5 years ago) and we’ll see it again next week when the 49ers host a playoff game in San Francisco. Pittsburgh was missing more than a couple of starters, including its running back, and its quarterback was playing injured as well. As aside…I refrain from calling Roethlisberger names because, honestly, he was never charged with anything. Deep in my heart, do I think he did something? Yes, I do. However, our society is so quick to pillory certain people and to jump to conclusions and, right or wrong, that is really unfair and contrary to the purpose of our legal procedures. So, to me, Roethlisberger is Big Ben, nothing more, nothing less. If you’re wearing his jersey, though, you’re a fucking dumbass.

I got off-topic there. Anyway, I think people watched this game because there was the potential for a miracle moment. This was an underdog sports movie come to life and to see it actually do so was a pleasure. I watched it by myself with nobody else in the house and I was still shouting and standing up during big plays–maybe this game has turned me into a football fan.