Time To Party

Captain L, whom I dated for a few months (did I ever come up with a suitable nickname?) invited me to her business school graduation party.  Although there is no stated animosity between us, we haven’t talked at all in a coupla months now.  Paul said I shouldn’t go if I’m not trying to maintain any sort of friendship with her.  It’s not that I don’t want to remain friends, but I certainly haven’t been trying…I’ve just focused lately on work, exercise and Mario Kart Wii.  And neither has she; the email was surprising because it came out of the blue and there was no follow up.  It seemed like an invitation out of obligation, but there’s no obligation and I wouldn’t have known about it anyway (Frankly, I thought she’d already graduated from business school).  Look at me overanalyzing the situation!  My hesitation about going wasn’t really about her but about all of her friends that I’d met and gotten to know just a little bit and who were all so (overly?) excited at the concept of Captain L and I dating.  Maybe that was part of the problem?  Overwhelming expectations from her friends?  ‘Cause I sure as hell had no expectations!  These days, I’m satisfied getting a returned phone call, much less an actual, living, breathing steady partner.  So, yeah, I didn’t want to deal with her friends and having to explain something I couldn’t explain and trying to save face.  But, just tonight, I was thinking about her one friend who arrived here from China just a few years ago and how Captain L has quite a bit of China knowledge herself and that now I’d have something non-awkward to talk about and you know what?  Fuck it, I’m going to the motherfucking party.  I don’t even give a fuck.  Fuck all ya’ll.